How it all began...

I'm a child advocate and have been from a young age. In high school, I participated every year in the March of Dimes walk to raise awareness of preventing birth defects. And in college I had the opportunity to sponsor a child from Bangladesh for a couple of years. I believe God put the desire in my heart to adopt when I was about 14-15 years old. I saw a TV program about all the abandoned baby girls in China. I remember ambitiously telling my parents and sisters that I will adopt a baby girl from China by the time I'm 25 - married or not! Of course I didn't quite know the responsibilities and resources required at that time but the desire to adopt stuck with me.

Then this wonderful man a.k.a. Steve :D came into my life in a special way in 2002...after being friends for 7 years! When our relationship became more serious, I brought up the topic of adoption. I wanted to know if for any reason we're unable to have our our own biological child, would he be dissappointed? And would adoption be an option even if we do have our own children? Oh...I was so happy when he told me that he was open to adoption.

So, from the day we said "I do" on September 25, 2004 we were ready to add a little blessing to our new family. But months passed by without getting the good news in the form of 'a plus sign' or 'two blue lines'...then one year passed...then two...then three. After getting various tests I was diagnosed with Poly-Cystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). During this time we did try to conceive using a common fertility drug but were unsuccessful. Although there are other treatments that are more intense and invasive we made a personal decision to conceive as naturally as possible.

I am most grateful to God that our battle with infertility brought us closer as a couple. We did not want infertility to consume our life or for it to become an obsession. Does it mean we handle it perfectly? Of course not! I'd lie if I said I never felt sad, dissappointed, or hopeless about my situation or occasionally feel jealous whenever I hear a friend get pregnant. We had to get used to responding to the dreaded "When's your turn?" And it's especially uncomfortable when some old ladies keep telling us to have a baby soon as if we're not trying OR worse...they start giving us remedies on how to get pregnant...well, you know what I mean! :-)

Why wait almost 5 years?

I firmly believe God makes everything beautiful in His time. God used the last four plus years to prepare us to be where we are today.

About 2 years ago, my desire to adopt grew stronger but I still didn't know where to begin. I remember going to Mass one Sunday feeling a little down -- I was having one of those moments when my heart was aching to have a baby. During the homily the priest said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "There is only one difference between a biological child and an adoptive child. A biological child is conceived in the womb of his mother and an adoptive child is conceived in the hearts and minds of his parents." God used those words to console me in the most gentle way.

So I decided to do some research on adoption from the internet and showed it to Steve. Once again he was supportive about it but the information we found were pretty overwhelming. We didn't know anyone who had adopted that we can talk to about the reputation of the agencies and all the legalities and regulations of adoption. A few months later, one of my co-workers announced that he and his wife were in the process of adopting 2 little boys (brothers). God opened the door for me to ask some questions about the process of adoption.

Then in Feb 2008 I went to a conference in Las Vegas for a few days. Not knowing anybody there I sat next to a person who's also sitting by herself and introduced myself. I found out she's originally from Iceland and now lives in Arizona with her husband and son. We got along immediately and became conference buddies. During one of our casual conversations she showed me a picture of her 2-year old son. Then she told me that she had adopted him and shared their adoption story. Just imagine...I'm from Indonesia, now lives in California, then goes to this conference in Las Vegas to meet this one person (out of six thousand attendees) who's originally from Iceland, lives in Arizona, and also attending the same conference. There is NO WAY this is a coincidence!! :) When I asked what agency she used she said Catholic Charities.

When I returned home I researched the Catholic Charities chapter in my area but they did not provide direct adoption services. I was referred to an adoption/foster care agency for more information. On August 20, 2008 we took the first step to become adoptive parents by attending their 2-hour adoption orientation. There we learned more about domestic adoption and its process. At the same time we also wanted to learn more about International adoption and Steve brought up the idea to adopt a baby from Indonesia, which I am all for it. So we researched more about it but were faced with a dilemma again since we also don't know anyone who had adopted through international adoption.

Not long after, in Oct. 2008, my family got the heartbreaking news that my oldest sister, Rosa, was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. During that time we wanted to focus our time and energy to be there for my sister whenever she needed us and placed our adoption plan on hold. She battled cancer with so much faith and grace for 4 months and went to be with her Father in Heaven in Feb. 2009.

What was amazing was that even though we placed our adoption plan on hold, God never stopped working on it! :) During the time my sister was ill, she literally brought hundreds of people together...friends I have not been in contact with for many years. Turns out, one of those friends had adopted a baby girl from China a few years ago. I immediately contacted her and she shared every detail of her adoption story and referred us to the agency she and her husband used to adopt from China. They completed the adoption process in 13 months. Unfortunately, when I checked the program now, it can take almost 5 years to be matched with a baby from China. I also did some research into international adoption from Taiwan, Singapore, Hong Kong, Vietnam, and South Korea but their programs are either on hold, limited, or too costly for us. But my friend was absolutely wonderful and gave me so much encouragement that one day God will unite us with our forever baby.

In June 2009, my mom, my sister Rita, and her 3 kids returned to Indonesia. I had researched adoption from Indonesia and from what I found out, it was not going to be easy. But they wanted to visit a couple of orphanages and find out more information directly. It was confirmed that because of the government's strict rules, it would be almost impossible for foreigners to adopt a baby from Indonesia. We would have to live and work there for 2 years and stay another 6 months after the placement of the child.

With international adoption not being an option for us, we now need to decide which agency to go with for our domestic adoption. Earlier this month, I was browsing the internet and came across an article on adoption and Lifetime Adoption Center was highlighted in that article. I checked out their website and somehow there was this immediate connection and sense of peace in my heart that I would be comfortable working with this adoption facilitator. I shared this information with Steve and after discussing it further, we submitted our application on Monday, 7/13/09. On Friday, 7/17/09, we were notified that our application has been pre-approved. I was overjoyed. This is the 'plus sign' or 'two blue lines' we've been waiting for!

So my dear family and friends...we'd like to announce that YES, we're expecting!! :D Our due date may be longer than the typical 40 weeks...but we ask you to please keep us and our forever baby in your prayers.