Not a day goes by that I don't think about my sister Rosa but I've been finding myself in tears lately and I can't really explain why. I think about what a wonderful role model she was as a mother and how excited she'd be about having another niece or nephew. I guess this is a bittersweet time for me. I'm so excited to be going through this process to expand our family but at the same time, I'm wishing for her to be here physically to share this excitement with me...for her to finally see her little sister become a mommy.
Just a few hours before she passed away, my mom, my other sister Rita, and my dear friend Anne (who's like my big sister) were gathered around Rosa and we were sharing stories about how goofy and lovable she was. It was so intimate and natural for us to be around her just having girl talk and laughing. Even though she couldn't respond, we knew she could hear us. Then we took turns whispering in her ear to tell her how much we love her and how we will miss her so much but we knew she wanted to go home so we told her it's OK to let go and not to worry about us. We also asked her to pray for us once she gets to Heaven. She's always known what was in my heart -- to be a mother one day.
I truly believe that she's interceding for us during this adoption process and God loves her so much that He's granting her prayers. One very clear example is my friend, Betti, who adopted a baby girl from China. We lost contact for so many years and through our love for Rosa, we were reunited. Betti was heaven sent...I'm sure of it! :) She has been nothing but supportive, comforting, and has given me so much information in the last few weeks. Her sharing of how God brought their baby girl into their family was so heartwarming. I still have many questions, worries, and nervousness about how we'll survive this long adoption process, but her experiences and helpful tips give me peace and hope.
We were so surprised when she offered to give us a gift to receive a year's subscription to Adoptive Family Magazine. She also happily passed on books on adoption and parenting that she's read so we can be as informed and prepared as possible to welcome a child into our home. The package came the other day and oh boy...she wasn't kidding about having so many books! There's more homework for us... :)
So, although my sweet dear sister Rosa is not here with me physically, her LOVE never departed from me and she's doing good works in Heaven. I'm so blessed to have amazing family and friends who are completely supportive and thrilled about our plan to adopt. Thank you, Lord!
I have to admit I've been pretty sleep deprived these last couple of weeks working on our adoption letter and profile. I've been going to bed way past midnight and waking up early to get to work. We submitted two drafts of our "Dear Birthmother" letter to Libby already and yet when I read it over there's always something I wanted to change or felt we could've said better. Let me tell you...trying to convey your life, love, family, and future plans into 750 words is not easy! :) We're still waiting for the comments and suggestions so I'm sure we'll make a couple more revisions before it's finalized.
Meanwhile, I'm excited our adoption social worker called. Her name is Linda and we're scheduled to meet for our first interview next Sunday, 8/30. She'll be explaining the process and giving us all the paperwork we'll need to submit. Please pray for us so everything will go smoothly.
Since my last post, we received our welcome binder and WOW...there are so much to do! But I'm not complaining. It feels so great that we're actually doing something to make this happen. Our Lifetime adoption coordinator is D'Arce (Dee) and she's been so supportive and answered all the little questions as they popped out of my head. We'll be working closely with Dee and do a scheduled check-in once a month to discuss our progress.
We will also be working with Heidi (website department) to work on the creation of our website and Libby (profile coordinator) to help us with creating our profile. Right now, we are hard at work composing our "Dear Birthmother" letter. I'm having a lot of fun making our profile scrapbook, too. The purpose of the dear birthmother letter and profile is for the birthmothers to learn more about us and get a glimpse of how life will be like for their baby if they choose us to be the adoptive parents. I have to admit there are some pressure because we really want to make it nice and approachable for the birthmothers. But, Lifetime gave us a step-by-step guide for creating our profile and Libby will review all the drafts and give us recommendations if we need to change anything. That will be so helpful!
At the same time, we just contracted with The Family Network (TFN) to complete our home study. A social worker will be contacting us soon to schedule the initial interview in our home and to give us "more" paperwork. A home study is an assessment of our family life and home to make sure we are suitable to become adoptive parents. We will be getting all the details during the first interview but from what I've read so far, we'll have to submit some legal documents, get a physical exam, get finger-printed, provide financial information, and go through several interviews in our home. Then the social worker will write a report on the findings and whether or not we've met the requirements for a child to be safely placed in our home. Nerve-wracking?? Absolutely! But we understand it's necessary and for the best interest of the baby. And I'm sure it's a peace of mind for the birthmother, too. And I believe once again that God is by our side throughout this process. A little over a month ago, just as we were starting the application process, a friend from high school found me on Facebook. It turns out that she's an adoption social worker for L.A. County and she told me she's willing to answer any questions we may have during our home study process. Indeed, our God is an awesome God!
One thing we've completed is setting up an 800 number. That number will be used for the birthmother to call us if they want to speak with us after reading our profile. We still have a long "to-do" list but we will handle them one day at a time...so let the paper chasing begin!
Not a day goes by that I don't think about my sister Rosa but I've been finding myself in tears lately and I can't really explain why. I think about what a wonderful role model she was as a mother and how excited she'd be about having another niece or nephew. I guess this is a bittersweet time for me. I'm so excited to be going through this process to expand our family but at the same time, I'm wishing for her to be here physically to share this excitement with me...for her to finally see her little sister become a mommy.
So, although my sweet dear sister Rosa is not here with me physically, her LOVE never departed from me and she's doing good works in Heaven. I'm so blessed to have amazing family and friends who are completely supportive and thrilled about our plan to adopt. Thank you, Lord!
